It’s never the right time

IMG 1135 300x224 Its never the right time

Finding time for it all is never going to be easy

You may have surmised from the age of me (46) and the age of my kids (11 and 7) that I had kids later in life. This wasn’t due to fertility issues or anything along those lines. Rather it was me waiting “for the right time.”

There was always something that seemed to need to get done before I could clear my schedule out enough to make room for kids. You know what I learned from this wait? There never is a right time. There will always be something that can hold you back from doing something on your “to do” list. Once I had my kids, yes, it added new challenges to my life, but it was and continues to be the best thing I’ve ever done.

The same kind of lesson can be applied to fitness goals. I find myself questioning why I chose this summer to add two triathlons to the schedule. I’ve got the kids home and the youngest still isn’t old enough to stay home on her own or under her brother’s supervision. In a year, that will change. And that in and of itself would make triathlon training a whole lot easier than it is right now.

But I have the urge to do triathlons this summer, so I’m not going to put it off. It means lots of creative scheduling on my part. It means spending most of some days unshowered as I go from one workout to carpooling to the next workout to writing an article to….you get the picture. I’m a little more tired than usual (I sure could use the occasional nap I get when the kids are in school). Social media is definitely taking a hit this summer and I’m not entirely thrilled with that, but I will put more effort into it when the kids are back in school. (something HAS to give in this scenario). When all is said and done, I don’t think I’ll regret picking this summer to do these races.

It’s never the right time–except when it is.

Have you ever let “it’s not the right time” get in your way? 

 

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Comments

  1. says

    I can so so so relate to this.
    We waited to have our daughter and while I dont regret it Im so GLAD we finally realized the timing would never be “perfect”
    Ive learned from that lesson, too.
    Miz recently posted..Mindful eating.My Profile

  2. says

    Definitely understand! I’ve postponed a couple work projects until August myself … when my daughter is back in school. It’s just “not the right time” to take on a massive work load. I recently read what I think is a really good article about us women trying to “have it all” and I think we do need to give ourselves a break. There is never the right time, or enough time, to be everything we want to be. So we just need to do the items we feel most important at the given time and if some things have to slide a little, so be it. As long as the kiddos are happy and healthy and the family is well, that is all that matters in the grand scheme of things! Best wishes on the tri’s … there is never a best time to train, I think. We always have life commitments of one sort or another :-)
    Christina recently posted..Healing our runner bodies and my love of elevationMy Profile

  3. says

    It’s never the right time but why do we feel the need to take on soooooo much?! This is not a criticism, I do the same, just an observation. I think there are just people who need to cram every waking moment with activity, have you ever taken it easy and just chugged along – I doubt it! Maybe we should try it, set a week aside when we do NOTHING. Yes, I know, by day 2 we’d be climbing the walls!!!!!!!!! ;)

  4. says

    I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE this post. I’m struggling with the timing of having our next baby. I definitely want to have another, but it seems like there so much to do before starting over again. It’s great seeing how you’re fitting it all in and still doing activities you love too.

  5. says

    I had my daughter at the same age (I’m 47 she’s just turned 9). Good luck with the triathlon training. I think that once you have kids, there’s never a “perfect time” anymore as there’s always something else going on. You just have to fit it all in!
    Robin recently posted..Canada Day 5KMy Profile

  6. says

    Thanks for this post! I know my husband and I keep thinking of more things to do before having kids. I’m beginning to think there will never be a right time if we keep that up.
    Very impressive to take on triathlon this summer with a busy schedule and kids at home.
    Abby @ Change of Pace recently posted..Working for the weekendMy Profile

    • says

      I can 100% ASSURE you there will always be “something” in the way of having kids – events, travel, work, etc. It’s literally something you just have to jump in and do. The best part – it’s SOOOOOOOOOO worth it. Well, most days ;) Kidding.
      Sheila recently posted..Miss-tashing the BabesMy Profile

  7. says

    You’re right. It is never the right time. You just have to prioritize and make work what you want to fit in. There is never enough time, yet it gets found.

  8. says

    We, too, had kids later in life, and it’s hard sometimes to balance their needs with our own needs for adventure and fitness. I think if anything we put things off a lot more before we had kids. Now that we have them, we have realized too that there is never going to be “a right time” – maybe that comes from knowing that raising kids will be a lifelong process. :)
    Shannon recently posted..One Week Until My Daughter’s First Ever 5K – With Me!My Profile

  9. says

    In my case apparently God had other plans for me and didn’t allow me the “right time” in my terms…I had no intentions on having kids…and BAAM two..one was that .000000001% via the pill, the other after 7+ yrs of no period and comic actions from first was told I could never have another…well He must’ve had other plans cuz along came Christa…so now I. Don’t really “plan” cuz whatever’s going to be is going to be…I have goals now but they’re not on any time schedule which yea. O all the experts say you have to have a deadline…I say,as long as I accomplish them then it’s all good…no ‘right time’ for me
    Tara Burner recently posted..Indulge. Enjoy. Live. Not always 100% healthy IS ok!My Profile

  10. says

    I’ve learned that lesson along the way, too… and I’m learning right now how hard balancing a tri-training schedule is! I’m glad I signed up for one that’s only 3 weeks away, I don’t think I could maintain the swim-bike-run combo of workouts for months. But I am enjoying the challenge of fitting it all in. I was thinking about how much less time moms get in the summer- it doesn’t effect us yet, as L is only 2. But that must be a huge transition each June!
    Laura recently posted..Three healthy, homemade popsiclesMy Profile

  11. says

    I can definitely relate to this. I’m “only” 27 but some of my married friends are having babies. I cannot fathom this right now and also cannot forsee a right time to start a family.

    I feel the same way that I might just have to bite the bullet eventually. I think some women have that desire and know it. For others they don’t know they wanted kids until they have them. I figured I better decide by 30. :-/

    I just keep hearing how everything changes with kids so I’m really hesitant to take that step!
    Holly recently posted..Daily Life ContinuesMy Profile

  12. says

    Oh yeah! I wish I had tried to qualify for Boston *before* having my kids, when I was in my 20s and either single or just married. I didn’t realize how much time I had then, and how (relatively) flexible my body was. And all that time for naps and sleep…..Wow.

    That said, I don’t think I really learned how to work hard and work organized until my kids came along. You really do learn from your children!! So perhaps I didn’t have the strength of will then to tackle the task….

    Oh well. You can only do what you can do now. The past is gone, and who knows what the future will bring, right?
    Terzah recently posted..Conference, Fire…and A Little More RunningMy Profile

  13. says

    Yes, yes, yes. When I was younger, my goal was all about managing my company. It was never a good time to have children. There comes a point when you realize you missed that time, it actually WAS a good time. So now, no kids, regretting it but learning the hard way.
    It’s great you’re doing the tri’s. You work hard at being a mom, doing your other work, you need to grab some “my time”. So, yeah – it’s a great time, great summer for you to go out and be a triathlete. Go for it but don’t forget to tell us all about it :)
    Joanne recently posted..FOFF Orzo and Tomato SoupMy Profile

  14. says

    I had my first two kids when it WASN’T the right time (I was 19 when my oldest was born); made things harder, but turns out it was an ok time. LIfe is what you make of it. I put off going back to school for my Master’s FOREVER because it wasn’t the right time. That meant I was pretty much forced back (due to my own decision) at the very worst possible time, and you know what…last semester was rough, but it worked out.
    Kate recently posted..Familiar ground: the Indian Camp Creek 12-hour mountain bike raceMy Profile

  15. says

    I dont think there really is a “right” time for anything. There just is the time. Taking the time now is a great choice because when you really want something, having to work for it makes it all the more special!
    shelly recently posted..One Word WednesdayMy Profile

  16. says

    Amen, sister. Amen. AJ was a total surprise. We weren’t planning on having kids for a few years. We wanted to travel, save $, buy a home, etc. But I can’t imagine life w/o him in it. It seem almost superficial at the time.
    And you hit it on the head with tying it to fitness goals. I think the same can be said for those looking to get started with a fitness plan in the first place. I’ve heard so many excuses – from long hours at work, to other commitments – there will never be an easy time to incorporate something that requires time, patience, and energy – you just have to close your eyes and jump into it =)
    Michele @ nycrunningmama recently posted..Random Things I’m LovingMy Profile

  17. says

    I’ve totally been caught up in thinking that “it’s not the right time.” What started turning it around for me was the decision to have kids. It’s never the right time for that. You’re never financially secure enough or accomplished everything that you wanted to personally or in your career. If I waited for that, I’d never have kids. I’ve kind of taken that and have tried to apply that to other things as well – sometimes successfully, sometimes not. It’s funny that you mention triathlons because I was thinking that I wanted to do another but my brain immediately went to thinking “there’s no way I can train for it. I don’t have time.” Hmmm, maybe I’ll have to rethink that.
    Christine @ Love, Life, Surf recently posted..Transylvania County – Land of Waterfalls…and the Hunger GamesMy Profile

  18. Holly says

    I have been wanting add more cross training – swimming + biking – to my weekly routine but week after week it doesn’t happen. Always a “not the right time”. Thanks for the reminder – just schedule it and then it IS the right time!

  19. says

    you are so right! never the perfect time, but we manage to balance and find ways to make this work anyway…that’s why Mother’s are THE best!!!

    Good luck to you, making all the things fall into place so you can conquer more goals and inspire us more and more each day!!!
    marissa recently posted..yummy 4th eats!My Profile

  20. says

    This is well said, but I do not want my husband to see this post. He wants babies…like STAT and I keep holding off for this race or that race. Oye. I promised him that maybe I would think about it after Boston 2013….but I am sure I will come up with another excuse then….
    Tasha @ Healthy Diva recently posted..The BEST NewsMy Profile

  21. says

    Yep, thee are lots of things that it seems like never the right time for. My wife talked me into having kids a little earlier than you and now I’m 46 with a 15 and 20 year old which is working out great for triathlon training now. This is only my third year doing tris and having self sufficient kids makes it much easier.

  22. says

    I completely know what you mean. We waited to have kids for years, and finally just had to take the leap (best thing ever).

    Lately I find myself thinking, I’d love to do an Ironman some day (yep, I’m dreaming big, seeing as I’ve only ever done 1 sprint tri!). And then I think now is definitely not the right time, I’ll have tons of time in 10 years when my kids are out of the house, but in reality, I may not have any more time then, I’m sure something else will come up.
    Beth @ Miles and Trials recently posted..Pain in the ButtMy Profile

  23. says

    Im fairly impulsive but also oddly very risk adverse, some times you just have to go with your gut! I do wish I would have started running marathons sooner so the BQ would have been more achievable and I would have been younger BUT… It wasn’t the right time and I don’t really regret it that much. What’s the point on that one? Besides when I do kick ass and BQ I’m just going to be that much more of a stud. Haha.
    Oh and ps…thanks for heads up if you don’t post as much. Enjoy your summer-You won’t regret that!
    Fueled by Spite recently posted..Ultra cray crayMy Profile

  24. says

    Oh, I say this all the time! So many people ask me about adopting and then say that they will do it when the “time is right” and while I respect that, on the flip side, if we wait for the time to be right (to adopt or do anything) it likely won’t happen because when is life ever perfect? Never! And we never know what tomorrow will bring. Start today with whatever it is you are putting off. Great post!
    Erin Henderson recently posted..BEAST MODEMy Profile

  25. says

    That was me until about a week ago, when I finally decided to go for two new jobs and got them both! I’m glad I had my daughter “young” (relatively speaking – I had mine at 26), but worried for the first couple years that I would wait f.o.r.e.v.e.r. to achieve my career goals. Well, you’re right about not sitting around waiting for the “right” time to do something. I think the best decisions we can make for ourselves are the ones that are a little scary. Some say “better safe than sorry,” but I say if you always play it safe, you’ll BE sorry!
    Jen @ ConcreteNCoffee recently posted..Here it Goes, Here it Goes, Here it Goes AgainMy Profile

  26. says

    Great post and so true! I’m working on taking life a day at a time and not to worry too much what might happen. Oftentimes things change anyway! So rather do what feels right right now :)
    Christine recently posted..Fantastic FridayMy Profile